I know this isn't my usual musing, (which have been lacking recently due to a loss of focus during my commute to work because of a new podcast addiction) but I thought I would share this anyway. If you don't know the song 'Total Eclipse of the Heart' by Bonnie Tyler then I suggest you watch it on youtube first. Then read my lyrics below to the tune. Enjoy!
Totally Shit When I Fart
Turnaround, every now and then I get a little bit crampy
And my eyes are turning brown
Turnaround, every now and then I get a little bit rumbly
And wonder if I had too much beer
Turnaround, every now and then I get a little bit nervous
That my best pair of undies will die
Turnaround, every now and then I get a little bit terrified
As I know a shitter isn't nearby
Turnaround brown eye, cause every now and then I blow a shart
Turnaround brown eye, every now and then I blow a shart
And I need to flee the scene
And I need to run for cover
I shouldn't have had all those beans
I'll be regretting it forever
And it really was quite obscene
Smell and fecal matter together
They will prove that everything isn't fine
It is a stigma that will ruin a party all of the time (all of the time)
I don't know what to do and I'll always have that mark
My ass is like a chocolate fountain spraying out chunks
I'm gonna need a quick bath
Really wish my sphincter was tight
Really wish my sphincter was tight
Once upon a time there was white in my drawers
But now they're only stinky and dark
And there's nothing I can do
I totally shit when I fart
Once upon a time there was zilch in my gas
But now there's always some kind of mark
Something I will spray
I totally shit when I fart
Turnaround brown eye, every now and then I blow a shart
Turnaround brown eye, every now and then I blow a shart
And I need to flee the scene (And I need to flee)
And I need to run for cover I
shouldn't have had those beans (I shouldn't have)
I'll be regretting it forever
And it really was quite obscene ('Cause of all the crap)
Smell and fecal matter together
They will prove that everything isn't fine
It is a stigma that will ruin a party all of the time (all of the time)
I don't know what to do and I'll always have that mark
My ass is like a chocolate fountain spraying out chunks
I'm gonna need a quick bath
Really wish my sphincter was tight
Really wish my sphincter was tight
Once upon a time there was white in my drawers
But now they're only stinky and dark
And there's nothing I can do
I totally shit when I fart
I totally shit when I fart
I totally shit when I fart
Turnaround brown eye
Totally Shit When I Fart
Turnaround, every now and then I get a little bit crampy
And my eyes are turning brown
Turnaround, every now and then I get a little bit rumbly
And wonder if I had too much beer
Turnaround, every now and then I get a little bit nervous
That my best pair of undies will die
Turnaround, every now and then I get a little bit terrified
As I know a shitter isn't nearby
Turnaround brown eye, cause every now and then I blow a shart
Turnaround brown eye, every now and then I blow a shart
And I need to flee the scene
And I need to run for cover
I shouldn't have had all those beans
I'll be regretting it forever
And it really was quite obscene
Smell and fecal matter together
They will prove that everything isn't fine
It is a stigma that will ruin a party all of the time (all of the time)
I don't know what to do and I'll always have that mark
My ass is like a chocolate fountain spraying out chunks
I'm gonna need a quick bath
Really wish my sphincter was tight
Really wish my sphincter was tight
Once upon a time there was white in my drawers
But now they're only stinky and dark
And there's nothing I can do
I totally shit when I fart
Once upon a time there was zilch in my gas
But now there's always some kind of mark
Something I will spray
I totally shit when I fart
Turnaround brown eye, every now and then I blow a shart
Turnaround brown eye, every now and then I blow a shart
And I need to flee the scene (And I need to flee)
And I need to run for cover I
shouldn't have had those beans (I shouldn't have)
I'll be regretting it forever
And it really was quite obscene ('Cause of all the crap)
Smell and fecal matter together
They will prove that everything isn't fine
It is a stigma that will ruin a party all of the time (all of the time)
I don't know what to do and I'll always have that mark
My ass is like a chocolate fountain spraying out chunks
I'm gonna need a quick bath
Really wish my sphincter was tight
Really wish my sphincter was tight
Once upon a time there was white in my drawers
But now they're only stinky and dark
And there's nothing I can do
I totally shit when I fart
I totally shit when I fart
I totally shit when I fart
Turnaround brown eye
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